Happy Birthday Carter!
|Aug 3rd and 9th 2010|
I can't even begin to think about where the time has gone. Two years??? really? As this day as been approaching I've found myself flashing back to those 13 days two years ago. It's been a journey to say the least. Our little family of two became a family of three and life changed forever. We will forever be grateful for those precious 13 days that we had with our sweet angel.
Back then, I thought that life would never go back to a feeling of normal ever again. It has, as weird as it to realize. But it is not the normal we once knew. It's a new reality that we live in, a feeling of striving to be more Christ-like; to be a better wife, husband, daddy, mommy, brother, sister, son, daughter, aunt, uncle, grandson, granddaughter and friend. We have a daily fight in us to be better so that we can be with Him again. There is nothing like having an angel baby to make you want to do all you can so that you can be with them forever!
As I look back on what these past two years have brought us, it's amazing to recognize the blessings we have been handed. For a long time I didn't think that I would ever want to get pregnant again, I didn't think that I could handle it. I struggled with thoughts of forgetting my sweet angel if we had other children. I struggled with thoughts of preterm pregnancy, and this tragedy happening again. I may have even told the Lord once or twice that if he took my baby I would never have another child again because I wouldn't go through this pain ever again....ha like telling the Lord what he can and can not do is even an option! In those moments I thought it was. Those moments were also some of my most spiritual moments I've even experienced, and probably ever will.
Even though the wounds are scared over and hurt less and less each day, we miss him an unbelievable amount and wish that we could hug him and run and play with him to celebrate this second birthday.
Life is funny how things work out....but thankfully one day we will be able to celebrate with him for many birthdays and such.
Happy Birthday Angel baby, hope it's a good one!
We love you!!!!
|Aug 4th, 2010|